russianchildatprayer | What's left of us (for broken

What's left of us (for broken_arrow)

The fire is spreading fast. The gamemaker wastes no time blowing up his arena, now that the winner stands.

She should be in the elevator already. The heat is unbearable, scorching the small hair of her arms where her uniform has torn, and stinging in countless ulcerous open wounds.

This one will scar.

There is no reason to linger. The other four are dead, she’s made very sure of that. Some put up a fight and suffered more than she would have wanted. But by now they all made it. They’re all relieved off what Dreykov still politely likes to call life.

All but one.

She could still end it. Her guns have drowned in that acid pool on the first day already and her last knife is stuck to the hilt in his liver. She can’t near him again if she doesn’t want to end up like him after all. But there’s enough rocks around. Worst case, she’ll burn her fingers while smashing his skull, before he has to suffer much worse pain.

The thick iron of the artificial walls, the faded layers of grass bred miles under the surface, just for this one purpose of yet another natural selection for Dreykov’s likes… All is glowing with the flames closing in around her. She can feel the hairs on her neck rise, smoking from the heat.

Still she keeps the door of the elevator open with her good arm, refusing to let it carry her to safety, to care, to the proud shimmer in Dreykov’s eyes and another nightmare to come by.

She shortly wonders if she should try take him with her. Maybe they’ll show mercy for once. He’s stood against her until the very last minute, after all. And even in that last fight she’s been nothing but lucky. It could be her bleeding out on the ground just a few meters away now.

She could try but the girl who’s been trained since before she even had been able to understood why and for what, knows better. The elevator won’t move if she drags him along with her. The doors won’t even close.

Only the strongest survive.

She’s been praying that he’ll pass out in these terrible few seconds of uncertainty, of trying to make a decision that’s long been made for her. She should know better. If a God exists, he has never taken particular interest in her life.

He turns to her, and she can see his eyelids are on fire. His lips form words that she can’t hear with one eardrum ruptured since day 3 and the rising noise of trees falling, barrels exploding, rocks crashing.

Maybe she’ll be able to tell herself for a while that he wants her to run.

But the part of her that turns away and takes the elevator to safety because there’s never been another way for her, knows better.

His last words were that he’ll find her.

She wishes, he could. Probably that’s why she left him alive. For the smallest chance that he’ll come for her, this time without making a stupid mistake. That he’ll be the one to finally put an end to it.

Only there’s no way he’ll make it out of there. There is no way out. They have made sure.

She won’t sleep better with that knowledge on her mind but that isn’t the point. Nightmares of seeing her lover burn to death is the easiest punishment she can wish for.

***************

Nightmares were hardly a rarity since Washington, but this was the first time Natasha awoke screaming. Still caught up in too bright, too detailed pictures burning behind her closed eyes, she realized too late that she was far too close to the edge of the bed. Before her instincts could kick in, she went to the floor, tangled in sweat stained sheets and landed on the very same shoulder that desperately needed a timeout anyway.

And that had been the last fucking time to take painkillers before going to sleep.

After she could breathe without wincing out in pain again, she left the bedroom to put together some kind of breakfast and a new load of meds. A postcard in her mailbox immediately made her forget about patching up that shoulder new. She couldn’t help but wonder how Steve had found her. It seemed, she had taught him better than she had realized.

Sam and him hadn’t found anything yet, that amateurishly coded card said. He wanted to know if she was okay. Saying they could use a hand. Sure they could.

He was stubborn, she had to give him that. She wondered if he’d still be once he found out the rest about her, all the stuff that was openly out in the world after Washington. And he would. Once they found Barnes and he would go back to a normal life… Steve would get to know the whole truth about her, sooner or later. There probably wouldn’t be postcards with smileys on them then anymore.

Time for another relocation, it seemed. She had waited for weeks, something that was far too dangerous anyway, and by now all hope was gone that at least a message of Clint might eventually catch up with her here. Hell, there was no telling if he was even still alive. Maybe the buzz out there had at least died down enough by now to try and find out that. The nightmares wouldn't go away from sitting and lying around in apathy much longer, that was for sure.

Ignoring her slightly dizzy condition, due to a few days without enough food, as much as the new warm, wet spots staining the bandage under her shirt, Natasha went back to the bedroom to pack her things. If Steve had found out where she was, chances were too big that someone else would too, to linger much longer.

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Just like that her smile was back and Clint felt his heart lighten. As long as he could still make her smile then everything would be okay, right? And even more so if he could still make her joke around.

“I mean, it doesn’t have to be Stark, but we could protect people,” he said, stumbling over the words a little. It wasn’t even a half baked idea yet, he had barely given it any thought, and while he knew that he should probably do so before talking about it, he had never been the best at thinking before he spoke. “Strike out on our own and be, like, bounty hunters or something.”

He looked a bit sheepish when he glanced down at Natasha, a bit worried about what she might think. “Not that the Avengers thing was a bad gig. We did a good job. Saved the world. We could do that again.”

Natasha didn't feel up to decisions right now, not after having just arrived and still sorting herself out, but Clint's arguments sounded reasonable. Really, there weren't that many possibilities left. What were they supposed to do? Exile on a lonely island? A few surgeries until no one would recognize them anymore and a desk job?

Not a thing for either of them. They belonged in the field. They just had to work the details out. There would be time for that in the next days.

Probably there were worse things then living in Stark Tower. Not many but a few.

"But no capes. And no spandex. At least not outside the bedroom."

She grinned up at him and wiggled a bit on his leg to underline her teasing.

Clint was already digging himself a hole, so he just kept going and would have continued to do so had Natasha not finally put him out of his misery. There would be time to plan later, and for now it was enough to know that they had options. They would survive this like they survived everything; their lives weren’t over, it was just time to start them fresh again.

He gave a goofy grin at her teasing, his hand roaming down to rest on her blanket covered rump, but not before giving it a gentle pat. “I think I can live with that.”

"Yeah? You mean, I get to see you in a french maiden dress soon?"

The way, Natasha bit her lower lip and looked up at Clint from under her lashes, didn't really match her continued teasing. He just couldn't keep his hands to himself, and right now she definitely didn't mind.

After her hands didn't feel like icicles anymore, she untangled them from the blanket and wrapped her arm around his waist again, her head nuzzled comfortably against the juncture of his thigh as if she had every right to be there and tease his skin with her breath and small kisses from time to time. Well, she had to keep him warm somehow since she was occupying the blanket, right?

“There ain’t nobody wants to see that,” Clint replied after a moment of surprise. He hadn’t been expecting that. “I’m kinda lacking in some areas that are sorta required to fill it out.”

Now Natasha he could definitely see in one of those outfits and... damn, that was a nice mental image right there, and she certainly wasn’t helping with the notion of taking a moment to rest up with the way she was looking at him. Then she had to go and nuzzle against him just a little too close for comfort and he sucked in a sharp breath before willing himself to relax as she peppered his skin with kisses. Far too long he had lived without this woman and he determined he had forgotten how to relax. Just by being here she seemed to have cured him of that.

Resting his head against the back of the sofa again, he let his hand trail lazily up her back then down again to give her ass a gentle squeeze before repeating the pattern all over again, adjusting the blanket on the way back up to keep her carefully covered.

Natasha had mercy with Clint's confusion and allowed that chuckle she had held back to reveal the remark as the joke that it was.

"Guess it's me who has to stick with the fancy outfits then, huh?"

She winked up at him and nuzzled into his loins then again, giving the sensitive skin right under his hipbone a teasing bite.

They were already playing with fire again, with Clint's hand repeatedly right there where he could turn her into pudding so quickly, but it was a playful, light dance this time instead of the desperate passion from before. They had time. Not all time in the world, but a little, to enjoy each others presence and recover mentally as well as physically, and she intended to make the best of it.

Most of the time he could tell when she was joking, but sometimes there were things that he wasn’t so sure of because he wouldn’t exactly put it past her to want them. She did have a kinky side, after all, not that he was complaining, though it wasn’t really something they had explored much... yet.

“Mmhmm,” he replied, grinning as she nuzzled and teased him. “All the fancy outfits. Or no outfits at all. I’m good with either.”

Eventually they would have to make a plan, would have to pack up and leave this place, but if for only today they didn’t even get dress then he was A-Okay with that. Being undressed with Natasha was one of his favourite things in the world.

"No clothes at all would be a shame. There's so many nice things to wear... You know, like a corset that ends right here..."

Natasha ran one fingertip leisurely along the underside of her breasts and didn't even try to hide the small shiver the touch elicited. Talking about this didn't exactly help, not being much too hot on him again. Not that there was the need to hold back.

"And maybe leather panties that open right here..."

That fingertip wandered down and dipped shortly between her legs. Even with the blanket between, she sucked in a little breath and bit her lower lip, quickly pulling away before temptation to linger there could be too strong.

"How about we start with an outfit like that and you take all of it off with your teeth?"

Natasha gave him that look from under her lashes again, the innocence in person

His eyes were instantly drawn to the motion of her hand, following greedily as she touched herself and wanting to follow that same path with his own fingers. Her reactions to that very slight touch made his own heart beat fast and had his blood flowing to certain extremities again. So much for resting up, but fuck it. Whatever tomorrow might bring he didn’t care; today was theirs, and why waste it resting? Injuries be damned.

Add that look she was giving him on top of everything else and he was practically panting for her in seconds.

“Sounds like we might have to do some shopping, unless you packed for any possibility,” he said, squeezing her ass a little more firmly this time.

"Shouldn't be a problem. I seem to remember there's some pretty... explicit shops in town."

Natasha sucked in another breath and pressed into the firm touch of his hand gladly, feeling her cheeks flush a little, and that certain warmth coiling right below her spine. She had always loved how Clint and her could go from goofing around to incredibly sexy within a matter of seconds, and especially today, they both needed it equally, if the heat rising from certain body parts close to her wandering lips was any indicator. Well, at least there was no danger of getting cold anytime soon...

With a little purr on her lips, she brought them from his hipbone slowly more to the middle of his body where she could still feel and taste on the tip of her dancing tongue what they had done earlier. For a moment, she just breathed against his skin, dragging out the teasing, to enjoy feeling him get excited for her again, and placed a few open-mouthed kisses here and there.

"Tell me what you feel like doing right now?"

That deep, seductive tone in her voice was back, letting him know she could think of a few things herself of course, but she always liked to hear his ideas.

Clint growled deep in his throat when she reacted so willingly to his touch. He had planned on bunking out here and not leaving until they needed some necessities, but maybe a quick trip into town a little sooner than that might not be such a bad thing...

His breath hitched and he held it a moment before letting his slowly as her breath played over his skin, teasing him and making him shiver, though it had nothing to do with being cold. In fact he was feeling quite the opposite right now.

“Um, well, not to be boring... but maybe we should move somewhere more comfortable first,” he answered, screwing up his face at how lame that sounded. He could have asked her for pretty much anything and she probably would have complied, but she wasn’t the only one who worried. This position hadn’t exactly been easy for her with both their injuries and he figured she could find a much more comfortable one with him flat on his back.

"Told you, you always have the best ideas."

His face was so adorable, Natasha just had to sit up to kiss that frown away. They couldn't stay the whole day in bed of course - though she had a feeling, they would try - because sooner or later they'd have to refuel their energy... But just spending the next hours lazy, enjoying each other and pretend that nothing else existed sounded just about perfect right now.

She untangled herself from that blanket and shook out that arm a little she had just laid on. Then she let her hand travel idly over Clint's chest and down to where his new found interest was very visible by now, giving him a nice firm squeeze before standing up.

"Come on, hotshot."

She made a show of swaying her hips on the way to the bedroom, knowing how quickly that could drive him crazy. They did share a certain preference for specific body parts after all... Once next door, she leaned over the bed a lot deeper than necessary to straighten out the sheets and covers. If he looked close enough, he might actually see that the new rising heat between them didn't leave her unaffected at all...

Natasha wasn’t put off by the possible mood dampener at all, and in fact she reacted rather enthusiastically to the idea. Grinning into the kiss, he sucked in a breath when she let her hand wander, giving him just a brief reminder of what was to come, not that he needed it.

When she got up and walked away he was left watching her with a goofy expression, watching as she put on a show just for him, only for him. Okay, yes, he was the only one there, but that wasn’t the point. When she was like this, teasing and relaxed and oh so real, it was always just for him.

Getting to his feet to follow her, he stopped just inside the doorways a moment to admire the view before stepping forward to run his hands over her perfect ass and grip her hips, pulling her back against him.

Natasha kept up her little show and gasped as if she hadn't felt him near her, turning her head to him with big eyes and her lower lip drawn between her teeth. Of course she made no move to pull away from him, but rather started grinding her ass against his crotch, with that same look of innocence from under her lashes from before.

"Oh, so you're in charge now, hotshot?"

Her voice was all sugared roughness, warm honey on a growl of pure, demanding arousal. An unashamed moan mixed in it when she leaned down even deeper, resting her weight on her shoulders on the mattress, to bring her hands to her bare breasts and squeeze them tightly.

She was very convincing. Had Clint not known her as well as he did he might have bought the innocent act. Well, had he not known her and had that innocent expression matched the rest of her body’s movements, which is most certainly did not. Groaning as she ground against him, his fingers tightened on her hips, keeping her press close.

“I wouldn’t say that...” he replied. Even if he appeared to be in the more dominant position right now it was clear that Natasha was still very much in charge, not that he was complaining. Not one bit.

This was probably the worst position they could be in right now with her resting on her injured shoulder and him standing on that hurt leg, but when she started moaning and touching herself he couldn’t quite bring himself to pull away. They should be taking it easy and trying to get back to their top shape for whatever might lie ahead, but she was just too fucking hot like this, practically begging him to take her .

As big as temptation was to provoke him further with these alluring movements of her hips, until he would just lose it and take her the way she needed it... A dull throb down her left side soon enough let her know, her shoulder wouldn't agree with that. If she didn't want to keep that annoying problem, she couldn't pull such stunts.

Well, no one was to say they couldn't improvise really well. Suppressing that little unnerved grimace, Natasha slowly pushed herself up on her good arm, rubbing her ass back against the solid, heated body behind her in the motion until she was standing right before him, her good arm reaching back to pull him in for a hungry kiss.

It was very satisfying to feel him press into her that hard again after their previous encounters. She couldn't help a needy little whimper on her lips as she undulated her body against his, feeling every inch of his bare, warm skin against her. That impressive libido on both sides doubtlessly came from years of chastity by a good part, but mostly it was just that... The need to feel him close, his breath, his hands, his mouth on her, the reminder of how much she meant to him and he meant to her, until everything else was silenced.

Her hand fell from his neck down to his hip and deeper to grab the delicious firmness that was his butt tightly while she circled her hips against him, breaths turning into pants all too soon. She wanted to touch him everywhere at once and not stop until they both passed out, but he was right about one thing... They should get more comfortable for that.

"Get that fine ass of yours on the bed, Barton."

As she pushed back up to stand in front of him, making sure to keep as much contact between them the entire time, Clint’s hands roved over her body, one slipping down along the juncture of her leg to her inner thigh, close but not quite touching her sex, while the other slid along her flat belly to hold her that much closer. Clearly she had come to the same conclusion he had and he was grateful that she had chose to move because he wasn’t sure he would have had the strength to.

Returning the kiss greedily, he matched the movement of her hips and held her flush against him, her back warm against his chest. They should probably be resting, taking some time, but he was already so fucking hard for her again it was ridiculous. Fortunately he wasn’t the only one as while he could have stopped if she wasn’t ready to go again, he was happy to not have to.

The hand on her stomach rose higher, brushing the underside of her breasts as she broke the kiss and he let out another growl when she proceeded to grab his ass. Both of them seemed to have a fetish for that particular body part, and both of them definitely had good specimens to work with. That was probably half the reason behind it, to be honest. Clint had always been more of a breast man, and Natasha certainly had fantastic tits, but he’d never really appreciated the posterior before she’d let him get his hands on hers. And so much more.

“Yes ma’am,” he replied, voice deep and rough. Still, it was with great reluctance that he finally let her go, though not without first bringing his hands up to give her breasts a playful squeeze. Stepping back he limped only slightly as he rounded the bed before dropping himself down on the side of it. Piling the pillows behind him he swung his legs up onto the bed and lay back before giving her a very inviting look marred only slightly by the pain of the movement and the relief to have his leg up again. “Now c’mere.”

Natasha frowned a little when she realized Clint was still in more pain than she had hoped. The new rising worry would have dampened the mood if he hadn't been so clearly hot for her. Still she made a mental note to go as easy as possible on him. There were so many things they could do without exhausting each other's leg muscles out...

Her body burned for him, just from these small promising touches a second ago, making it all but easy to not take his invitation immediately. The wish to wind him up further, to see him shiver and hear him moan for her, was stronger.

In a graceful, fluid motion she got on her knees on the lower end of the mattress and slowly made her way upwards, her legs framing his, a predatory look in her eyes that matched the way her tongue swept over her lips perfectly. Her breasts swayed softly in the motion as she leaned over him and rubbed against his heated skin when she leaned down to kiss him, always careful to keep her body weight away from his leg as much possible. He tasted of need and a little sugar from their breakfast when her tongue sneaked into his mouth, claiming him as hers.

The soft purr on her lips quickly turned into a moan when she pressed her center against him and his hardness slided smoothly through her slick folds, so easily tempting to just take him immediately. That wasn't what she had in mind just yet though.

Slowly making her way back down, she kept her lips and tongue on him, sucking, kissing her way from his neck to his chest until her teeth grazed the tender skin of one hardened nipple, just begging to be bitten. Her hand dipped shortly between her widely spread legs, bathing in the growing wetness there until her hips bucked against her own movements. She tore it away reluctantly to wrap it around Clint's rock hard cock instead and started to stroke him slowly, lightly, a warm, smooth promise of what was to come soon.

Her eyes were firmly on him as she moved her mouth to his other nipple and tightened her grasp on him just the slightest bit, her tongue teasing the sensitive flesh another promise she intended to keep... But not before she hadn't completely driven him out of his mind.

He saw her frown and inwardly cursed himself. Sure, there was still some pain, but not enough to detract from the pleasure that was to come as long as Natasha didn’t let her worry take over. She lingered a little too long on her feet and he was just about to start protesting when she finally climbed onto the bed and started crawling towards him causing his words to immediately dry up. He watched her tongue dart over her lips like she was sizing up her dinner, watched her perfect breasts hanging free and begging to be touched. When she kissed him he tangled one hand in her hair as he eagerly kissed her back.

He moaned with her as she rubbed against him. She was so warm and wet and inviting and he would have gladly let her take him right then, let her sink down over him and envelop him. Instead he ended up muttering in disappointment when she ended the kiss and moved lower, though that feeling didn’t last long. Never once did her lips leave his skin, her kisses tender until she reached his nipple and added teeth to the game. Sucking in a sharp breath, his eyes were filled with passion when he looked down at her, watching her watching him. His hips involuntarily bucked upwards when she wrapped her hand around him, using the natural lube of her body to stroke him with just the right pressure. His own hands slid along her ribs before cupping her breasts, feeling their weight before massaging them gently.

Clint did exactly what she had hoped for, knowing her needs and desires just too well after all this time. He had her gasping and writhing against his hands in no time until she had to stop her eager sucking and biting. With both his nipples deliciously sensitive and red now, he pressed against her stomach, into her leisurely caressing hand even harder now, and she made a mental note to get back to this game later.

Forgotten seemed the pain for the moment, or at least overshadowed by growing lust. She could press into his rough, skilled hands and let herself fall completely, rub her center along his cock again in slow, enticing strokes while she still looked at him from hooded eyes, completely lost in the both arousing and calm, slow scene.

"Don't stop that", she murmured huskily and slowly reached behind her then to wrap her hand around him again, gently guide him until she could take him in, inch by inch, moaning and panting.

The way she reacted to his touch just egged him on further. They both knew how to play each other’s body like a finely tuned instrument, knew what string to pluck what chord to play, to get the other singing, and it was clear that no matter how much time passed it was something they never forgot.

She was so hot, so inviting, as she rubbed her centre along his full length, coating him and heating him and making him so fucking hard. Her husky voice hit him right in the pit of his stomach, and he grinned despite the growing strain. “Wouldn’t dream of it,” he muttered back, pinching her nipples just a little harder for effect before circling his thumbs gentle over them, gentle yet rough due to his callused fingers.

As much fun as the foreplay was he was glad she didn’t draw it out too long. She sank down over him, taking him in, sheathing him in her tight, wet heat. “Fuck,” he breathed, his eyes never leaving her face, watching every shift in her expression.

One of the things Natasha loved so much about having sex with Clint was how honest he reacted to everything they did. While there were still times when she herself tried to muffle her sounds or hide her face on his shoulder, when she threatened to lose control over her body... That blissful look on Clint's face and all these delicious sounds he was making were an open book.

It just turned her on even more. When they were past teasing and finally joined, their hips intertwined in their most intimate embrace and she could feel him throb with need inside of her, she just had to stop for a moment. She had to watch him for a second, leaning over him with her good arm draped over his chest while her eyes sought his heated gaze, a soft smile playing on her lips.

"Love it how you feel", she murmured before leaning in for a deep, demanding kiss, hips just circling slightly to enjoy that perfect way of being close to him for a few moments longer before desire would take completely over.

In that first silent, still moment after they joined he could feel his heart racing, his blood pumping, and as he stared up at her he almost forgot to breathe. She was a vision, with her skin flushed and her hair all mussed from their earlier activities.

Clint kissed her back eagerly, groaning a little against her lips when she moved, no matter how minimal. She was overwhelming his senses until all he could smell was her aroma, all he could taste was her lips, all he could feel was her smooth skin and her wet heat engulfing him. He loved how she felt too, loved how hot and tight she was, loved tasting the salt on her skin, loved seeing that soft smile on her lips when she wasn’t trying to devour him, which he also loved. He loved everything, loved ever second of this. “Love you,” he murmured against her lips.

It took him a second longer than it probably should have to realise what he had said, and luckily he couldn’t seem to speak or he probably would have started to babble and try to make excuses.

Huh. Well, that was interesting.

Natasha's sex-addled brain needed a moment to catch up with these last whispered words on Clint's lips. Her body and her mouth against his froze for a moment while she tried to categorize this new development in her head, tried to find any knee-jerk reaction inside to this unexpected, nearly casual thrown in remark.

None of that happened, and after a moment of confusion she realized, there was nothing to be surprised about. She had already known, suspected at least. The feelings between them had always waited and played underneath the skin, never spoken about, never quite handled but always waiting patiently.

Maybe this was a good time to work things like that out. Not like they had anyone to answer about such things anymore.

But unlike Clint sometimes, she wasn't someone to blurt her feelings out easily, not even in the middle of fantastic sex, so she went for another soft smile instead, withdrawing just enough so Clint could see it.

"Promise you'll remember what you just said when we're done here?"

She finally moved her hips, still slowly, lifting herself off him enough so she could enjoy this beloved friction and stretch of him penetrating her again, causing her muscles to clench around him tightly. Just that perfect intimate heat that washed away all burdening thoughts and too deep feelings she didn't want to deal with right now. Later, with a clear head.

For now it was comforting enough to know they indeed had some very important things to talk about.

Idiot, idiot, idiot! He hadn’t meant to say that. He had meant to tell her that he loved how she felt too, loved how wet she was, how wild, but apparently forming a sentence of more that two words had been damn near impossible in the moment. Clint, you dummy!

She froze, and he thought that was it. She was going to quickly climb off him and run, and leave him here to wallow in his own stupidity. It had been so long since they had been together and it was too soon to just blurt something like that out. And right in the middle of sex? Really?

“Tash, I...” he started to say, but he still couldn’t find the words. Should he take it back? Lie to her and tell her he didn’t mean it? Should he just jump in with both feet and confess everything? Oh man, she was pulling back, she was going to... smile at him?

Well, that was unexpected, but not as much so as her words that left him entirely speechless. She actually wanted to talk about it. Later, when they weren’t busy, she wanted to talk about what he’d said. He could only nod in response, then she was moving, riding him slowly, and it felt so good he quickly forgot any idea of talking right now. His hands moved to her hips, his thumbs circling over her hips bones as he pushed up to meet her. Oh yeah, talking could wait. Maybe he should have just gotten her to gag him.

What's left of us (for broken_arrow)

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